My cliff notes for “Come to your terms“:
Facing fears can be seem so difficult for some that they think it is impossible, so this exercise isn’t for everyone, but here it is:
If you encounter a fear of something so terrible you panic to think it, breath deeply and face it.
Come to terms with the worst, with the unthinkable. Imagine painful possibilities. Face them, and know them.Visualize them. Don’t downplay, excuse, plan to mitigate, or tolerify the possibility, just consider it fully.
If you truly pre-accepted worst case scenarios that are in the realm of possibility — Might you die? Might a loved one? — then you can let go of the fear and anxiety that are present now, and go on functioning more fully without them weighing you down. And, if that possible bad outcome does come to pass, your freak out reaction will be lessened, because you will have already accepted it.
Fears control us. They cause us to avoid thinking in certain directions, let alone dealing with things as they are. Our worst fears can cause us to hold back — paradoxically diminishing our ability to avert our them.
Fully examining the negative outcomes saps the terror and removes its weight. If the ultimate price of your actions could be terrible if things don’t go your way, fully consider what that would be like, accept it, and decide to embark down that path having made this choice in spite of the fear. This saps the fear, and allows you to re-exert your control to steer towards a brighter future the best you can.
This post is part of the thread: Replacing Guilt Cliffs Notes – an ongoing story on this site. View the thread timeline for more context on this post.